Lois’ wealthy aunt Marguerite Pewterschmidt comes to visit, but drops dead on their doorstep (much to Peter’s relief—“Be careful what you wish for, eh, Lois?”). A videotaped message from Aunt... more
Lois is upset that Stewie has wet the carpet in the living room. Stewie emphatically denies this, but Lois and Peter are convinced that it’s a sign that Stewie is ready to potty train. However, it’s... more
For Quahog's yearly harvest festival parade with floats, the theme by Peter, "That episode of Who's the Boss? where Tony sees Angela naked in the shower", is chosen. The float built by Peter, Quagmire,... more
Lois finds a lump on Peter's chest and worries that the lump could mean cancer, prompting Peter to see a doctor. Before his medical test results come in, Peter treats the time he has as if he were dying,... more
Lois is named director of the Quahog Players theater group production, and she decides to produce The King and I. Joe, despite being paraplegic, is named choreographer. Lois names Peter producer in the... more
Peter and the neighbors receive an advertisement in the mail, indicating that they will receive free boats if they attend a timeshare sales pitch. However, during a high-pressure sales interview, Peter... more
Chris has been failing school recently, and Lois forbids him from watching TV until his grades improve. Lois suggests to Peter that he help Chris with his study skills. This prompts Peter to lie to her... more
Lois' campaign for school board president is interrupted by a call from Chris' principal - apparently Chris was caught peeking into the girls' locker room. While Peter and Lois are at the school talking... more
For his birthday, a blindfolded Peter drives the family to Bob's Funland and Putt Putt Golf. The attraction's owner, Bob Funland, soon asks them to leave, after Peter makes repeated trouble for other customers.... more
Peter plays a magical clam, in a historical re-enactment of Quahog's founding. The celebration is led by Mayor Adam West, making his first appearance in the series. Meg compares Peter's job to having Ronald... more
The episode begins with Brian visiting his psychiatrist, where he reveals that he was born in a puppy mill and the circumstances under which he was taken from his mother as a puppy. Afterwards, Brian volunteers... more
Lois and Peter become concerned when a toad-licking problem arises in school. After finding a toad in Chris' pocket they suspect him, but then they discover that Meg was holding the toad for one of the... more
Concerned that Stewie isn't playing well with other children, Lois puts him in daycare to be around, other children his age. With Stewie out of the house, Lois is bored so Brian suggests she get a job. Peter... more
The Griffins need a new car. Lois decides to buy one out of the classified ads, but Peter refuses, having concluded that buying a car out of the classifieds is what led to an acquaintance of his contracting... more
When Brian catches fleas, the house becomes infested. The exterminators come, armed with military weaponry rather than conventional extermination equipment, and shoot up the house, while hunting the fleas.... more
Peter gets audited by the Internal Revenue Service, and is denied a tax refund. His plans to build a backyard pool are further derailed when a request for a zoning variance leads to Mayor West revealing... more
A visit to Brown University (Brian's alma mater) shows that Meg, does not have enough extracurricular activities to be admitted, so Meg decides to write for her high school's paper. Meg's first story is... more
Lois desperately searches for one piano student who can beat her rival Alexis's student at the piano competition. Meanwhile, in a parody of Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory, Peter drinks even more... more
When Lois asks the family to help her with spring cleaning, Peter attempts to clean the house with a hose. This method ends up breaking things in the house. Because of this, Lois tells Peter to go somewhere... more